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Writer's pictureCarrie Pestritto

Be a Better Conversationalist

Updated: Dec 19, 2021


I couldn’t think of an author/writing-centric tip to share this month, so instead I thought I’d tell you guys about some great advice I recently received.


This was more of an advice-through-observation kind of thing, but by watching one of my LDLA teammates, I’ve learned how valuable it can be to approach communication in a more conversational manner. I have a tendency (probably developed from having day jobs with extremely high-volume workloads, but also from just living in NYC for a decade and being an introvert) to be very straightforward and concise when talking with others, and I think that sometimes that can be off-putting for those on the receiving end, especially when over email and/or if they don't know me well.


My colleague has a really wonderful communication style that is still professional and to the point, but feels a bit more relaxed and friendly than my own, and I see can how it contributes to her relationships with people. As a result, I'm making an effort to adopt her style a bit and:


  • Be less formal

  • Explain my reasoning behind questions

  • Share my thought process

  • Be willing to chat/engage in smalltalk more!


I think doing this provides a universal advantage, not just an agent-specific one, which is why I am passing it along to you! Tell me: do you notice when someone is more approachable (either in their emails or in person-to-person conversation) and how does it change the way you interact with them?

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Alexia Chantel
Alexia Chantel
Nov 19, 2019

I used to manage a cancer center and from my former experience with good and bad supervisors, I knew I wanted to be the kind that actually listened. So I made a point to chat with people every day about things other than work, to help me see them as people instead of only employees and to also make sure they felt seen and thus heard when they needed to bring up workplace items. I found the more open and engaging I was, the easier my directness was received when I needed to be.


I wish you luck in stepping outside your introvert circle! :)

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